That Was Then, This is Now

Growing up in today’s society, everything seems to be cut out for me as to what I should think, act and how I should look. I would easily classify myself as a tomboy, even to this day. When I was little all I would only wear sweatpants and big t-shirts because it was easy and comfy. I played baseball with my neighbors that happened to all be boys, and found entertainment in popping off the heads to my sisters Barbie dolls. I wasn’t concerned about others opinions of me. But things change as people grow up and become more aware of their surroundings. Now with the different pressures from society, I think a little differently now. It’s as if being a human comes along with these stereotypes that we must conform to, otherwise we become judged and looked down upon.  This pressure has evolved to the idea that girls only wear pink, and boys only wear blue. Nursing is supposedly a woman’s career, while engineering is a man career. Ruth Padawer backs up this opinion in his article, What’s so Bad About A Boy Who Wants to Wear a Dress, when he states females having a “dislike and sometimes incapacity for needlework” (Padawer, 1) while males are “entirely averse to outdoor games” (1). It has become the norm of our population, with few exceptions. After reading a good amount of articles relating to gender and it’s impact on the world, I think it’s time for society to get a wake up call. Gender should not define who I am, for it should only represents the parts on my body.

Preschool is where children get their first encounter of interaction with other children their age. Any parent would like to believe that preschool is a harmless atmosphere that will enable their child to start evolving into the person they will once become. What few parents tend to realize is that when a bunch of curious little mouths get placed into one room, anything can be said. Children are so open and honest, they do not think before they speak. My mom constantly reminds me of the story when the priest approached me at church and asked how I liked mass when I was around 4 years old. My response was “I think it’s boring”. Being so young, the idea of lying was not introduced yet. Me, along with all the other young children have no problem asking any type of question, not knowing that some questions may be uncomfortable to others. This type of behavior was portrayed in the article It’s Okay To Be Neither written by Melissa Tempel. In this reading, she tells the story of her journey as a teacher and the opportunity it gave her to help young students become more accepting towards ideas they have never heard of. Before Tempel had a gender variance child herself, she admitted to being one of the teachers that “often used gender to divide students into groups or teams” (Tempel, 2) because it “seemed easy and obvious”(2). Although now this seems to be a closed minded point of view, I would have agreed with Tempel prior to becoming informed about gender variant children myself. What caught my eye the most about this article were the activities Tempel was able to do with the kids in order to give them a more open look on gender and what it means. Instead of separating the children by gender in the line for the bathroom, she separated them by their interests. It didn’t matter if you were a boy or girl; all that mattered was if you liked milk or juice better (Tempel, 2-3). Being able to expand and educate young minds about acceptance is the first step in having an open community towards the daily struggles gender-variant children.

Having such little research done towards gender non-conforming children, it is difficult to get a grasp on the amount of lives affected by the constant judgment society imposes. Estimations exhibit “that 2 percent to 7 percent of boys under age 12 regularly display “cross- gender” behaviors” (Padawer, 3). Girls on the other hand, aren’t studied as much because of the “departures from traditional femininity are so pervasive and accepted” (qtd on pp3). These statistics lead into another gender-related issue of who gets treated more fairly depending if you’re a boy or girl. Going way back into history, men were always the dominant figure in the household. They were the ones that would provide money for the family and a roof over their head. The women barely had any effect on decision-making or much of anything. They didn’t have a job, weren’t allowed to vote, and weren’t allowed to own their own property. Because of all these restrictions, why would a man want to switch identities with a woman? It is understandable why a woman would like to become a man in order to gain all these different capabilities. On the other hand, when a man tries to act like a woman it is recognized to be more confusing as to why someone would want to be classified as “the lesser gender”(qtd on pp7). Because of this outlook society has on the male and female roles, researchers find gender variant boys to create a much more interesting study.

I am confident that the harsh views on non-conforming gender children will evolve into a more open and accepting topic. I feel as if there are more people being open and honest with themselves now then there were back in history. With this comes the assumption that the only other change between now and then is the increasing amount of people being forward and public about it. What ever happened to that phrase “It’s not what’s on the outside that counts, it’s what’s on the inside?” In today’s generation, it applies more than ever. Being open about how you feel and what your interests are is something that no human should be ashamed of or feel as though they aren’t included in today’s version of the “norm”. Hopefully with time, the more honest we are with ourselves, the more we can be with each other.

Growing up in today’s society, everything seems to be cut out for me as to what I should think, act and how I should look. I would easily classify myself as a tomboy, even to this day. When I was little all I would only wear sweatpants and big t-shirts because it was easy and comfy. I played baseball with my neighbors that happened to all be boys, and found entertainment in popping off the heads to my sisters Barbie dolls. I wasn’t concerned about others opinions of me. But things change as people grow up and become more aware of their surroundings. Now with the different pressures from society, I think a little differently now. It’s as if being a human comes along with these stereotypes that we must conform to, otherwise we become judged and looked down upon.  This pressure has evolved to the idea that girls only wear pink, and boys only wear blue. Nursing is supposedly a woman’s career, while engineering is a man career. Ruth Padawer backs up this opinion in his article, What’s so Bad About A Boy Who Wants to Wear a Dress, when he states females having a “dislike and sometimes incapacity for needlework” (Padawer, 1) while males are “entirely averse to outdoor games” (1). It has become the norm of our population, with few exceptions. After reading a good amount of articles relating to gender and it’s impact on the world, I think it’s time for society to get a wake up call. Gender should not define who I am, for it should only represents the parts on my body.

Preschool is where children get their first encounter of interaction with other children their age. Any parent would like to believe that preschool is a harmless atmosphere that will enable their child to start evolving into the person they will once become. What few parents tend to realize is that when a bunch of curious little mouths get placed into one room, anything can be said. Children are so open and honest, they do not think before they speak. My mom constantly reminds me of the story when the priest approached me at church and asked how I liked mass when I was around 4 years old. My response was “I think it’s boring”. Being so young, the idea of lying was not introduced yet. Me, along with all the other young children have no problem asking any type of question, not knowing that some questions may be uncomfortable to others. This type of behavior was portrayed in the article It’s Okay To Be Neither written by Melissa Tempel. In this reading, she tells the story of her journey as a teacher and the opportunity it gave her to help young students become more accepting towards ideas they have never heard of. Before Tempel had a gender variance child herself, she admitted to being one of the teachers that “often used gender to divide students into groups or teams” (Tempel, 2) because it “seemed easy and obvious”(2). Although now this seems to be a closed minded point of view, I would have agreed with Tempel prior to becoming informed about gender variant children myself. What caught my eye the most about this article were the activities Tempel was able to do with the kids in order to give them a more open look on gender and what it means. Instead of separating the children by gender in the line for the bathroom, she separated them by their interests. It didn’t matter if you were a boy or girl; all that mattered was if you liked milk or juice better (Tempel, 2-3). Being able to expand and educate young minds about acceptance is the first step in having an open community towards the daily struggles gender-variant children.

Having such little research done towards gender non-conforming children, it is difficult to get a grasp on the amount of lives affected by the constant judgment society imposes. Estimations exhibit “that 2 percent to 7 percent of boys under age 12 regularly display “cross- gender” behaviors” (Padawer, 3). Girls on the other hand, aren’t studied as much because of the “departures from traditional femininity are so pervasive and accepted” (qtd on pp3). These statistics lead into another gender-related issue of who gets treated more fairly depending if you’re a boy or girl. Going way back into history, men were always the dominant figure in the household. They were the ones that would provide money for the family and a roof over their head. The women barely had any effect on decision-making or much of anything. They didn’t have a job, weren’t allowed to vote, and weren’t allowed to own their own property. Because of all these restrictions, why would a man want to switch identities with a woman? It is understandable why a woman would like to become a man in order to gain all these different capabilities. On the other hand, when a man tries to act like a woman it is recognized to be more confusing as to why someone would want to be classified as “the lesser gender”(qtd on pp7). Because of this outlook society has on the male and female roles, researchers find gender variant boys to create a much more interesting study.

I am confident that the harsh views on non-conforming gender children will evolve into a more open and accepting topic. I feel as if there are more people being open and honest with themselves now then there were back in history. With this comes the assumption that the only other change between now and then is the increasing amount of people being forward and public about it. What ever happened to that phrase “It’s not what’s on the outside that counts, it’s what’s on the inside?” In today’s generation, it applies more than ever. Being open about how you feel and what your interests are is something that no human should be ashamed of or feel as though they aren’t included in today’s version of the “norm”. Hopefully with time, the more honest we are with ourselves, the more we can be with each other.